Forgive me for being absent for so long. Not that you care. But anyway, its been a while and I think its time to write something before this blog merajuk and pull face at me.
So, where do I start?? Okay, sometimes I think parents think they know whats best for their children. But in reality, I think its more of parents wanting whats best for their children. What they (parents) want does not necessarily be the best for that child. Hmm.. Im saying this because sometimes, well most of the times, parents have different visions from what their children have in mind. What children want in life is closely related to their personalities. Well, at least what I wanted is closely related to my personality. Belum lagi tercapai. But of course, its true what the Rolling Stones say, we dont always get what we want. Thats life. Nobody says life is a bed of roses. Now, parents start to come into the picture and start pushing their children into doing something else. Example: Career choices, marriage, hobbies, holidays, what to eat/what not to eat. I think parents should give their children the freedom to choose and at the same time supervise them. Its good to let them fall once in a while so they could learn something from it. Instead, children are stuck, they wouldnt know what to do. Because all these while, they are being push into a situation they are stuck by design. In this case, some would even lie. Lie to protect their loved ones, lie to protect themselves, God knows why they lie. And nobody wants that lie to prolong.
There are also some parents who want their children to do something they (parents) didnt get to do when they were younger. So the child is being thrust into it. Parents are lucky if the child is the sensible quiet type. Which means, they (the anak2) would say "Yes Master Yoda" at all times. But there are also the stubborn ones. These are the complicated ones. And there are ways to tackle them. And the best would be to put themselves in the child's shoes. Sometimes its best not to force things on them. Rather just let them be. At one point they (the anak2) are bound to come back. Of course its not easy. But the more you push, the more distance they become. Nobody wants that. Im not saying totally ignore the child. What Im saying is, give the child the space that they need to grow up. Its not easy growing up if parents are constantly hovering over them. I know how it feels like. But Im the "Yes Master Yoda" type. Children tend to keep their distance when they are not happy about something. And of course we wouldnt want that distance to exist at all. Instead of babysitting 24/7, show some trust. Keep in touch constantly and when they fall, the parents will be there to catch them falling.
Okay, lets go back up. The reason why I say they need the freedom to choose is because if you dont they will definitely do it behind your back. And thats even worst. With the freedom you allowed, most things happen in front of your eyes. But of course, there has to be a limit to the freedom. Must be a certain amount of give and take. Equilibrium is important to keep it , the relationship healthy. Hear each other out. There are too many times when both parents and children refuse to listen to the other thinking only about themselves. About what they (each other) want and the importance of it to only themselves. They failed to put themselves in the others shoes and analyze what just happened. So the real situation is not really addressed. And both parties are at a lose end. Too bad... No empathy at all.
I need to stop writing now coz En. Roslan wants to use my laptop. So ciao people... Remember, this is just my opinion. Im not a parent myself so please, dun bash me up... Dun be rude....
So, where do I start?? Okay, sometimes I think parents think they know whats best for their children. But in reality, I think its more of parents wanting whats best for their children. What they (parents) want does not necessarily be the best for that child. Hmm.. Im saying this because sometimes, well most of the times, parents have different visions from what their children have in mind. What children want in life is closely related to their personalities. Well, at least what I wanted is closely related to my personality. Belum lagi tercapai. But of course, its true what the Rolling Stones say, we dont always get what we want. Thats life. Nobody says life is a bed of roses. Now, parents start to come into the picture and start pushing their children into doing something else. Example: Career choices, marriage, hobbies, holidays, what to eat/what not to eat. I think parents should give their children the freedom to choose and at the same time supervise them. Its good to let them fall once in a while so they could learn something from it. Instead, children are stuck, they wouldnt know what to do. Because all these while, they are being push into a situation they are stuck by design. In this case, some would even lie. Lie to protect their loved ones, lie to protect themselves, God knows why they lie. And nobody wants that lie to prolong.
There are also some parents who want their children to do something they (parents) didnt get to do when they were younger. So the child is being thrust into it. Parents are lucky if the child is the sensible quiet type. Which means, they (the anak2) would say "Yes Master Yoda" at all times. But there are also the stubborn ones. These are the complicated ones. And there are ways to tackle them. And the best would be to put themselves in the child's shoes. Sometimes its best not to force things on them. Rather just let them be. At one point they (the anak2) are bound to come back. Of course its not easy. But the more you push, the more distance they become. Nobody wants that. Im not saying totally ignore the child. What Im saying is, give the child the space that they need to grow up. Its not easy growing up if parents are constantly hovering over them. I know how it feels like. But Im the "Yes Master Yoda" type. Children tend to keep their distance when they are not happy about something. And of course we wouldnt want that distance to exist at all. Instead of babysitting 24/7, show some trust. Keep in touch constantly and when they fall, the parents will be there to catch them falling.
Okay, lets go back up. The reason why I say they need the freedom to choose is because if you dont they will definitely do it behind your back. And thats even worst. With the freedom you allowed, most things happen in front of your eyes. But of course, there has to be a limit to the freedom. Must be a certain amount of give and take. Equilibrium is important to keep it , the relationship healthy. Hear each other out. There are too many times when both parents and children refuse to listen to the other thinking only about themselves. About what they (each other) want and the importance of it to only themselves. They failed to put themselves in the others shoes and analyze what just happened. So the real situation is not really addressed. And both parties are at a lose end. Too bad... No empathy at all.
I need to stop writing now coz En. Roslan wants to use my laptop. So ciao people... Remember, this is just my opinion. Im not a parent myself so please, dun bash me up... Dun be rude....
